Having Kids at an Older Age: A Honest Look at the Challenges and Joys

This question surfaces often in modern parenting conversations: Is it okay to have kids later in life? More and more couples are delaying parenthood, yet anxieties about age, health, and long-term impact remain. Familist.ph recently explored this in an article published on February 3, 2025, where one mother shared her experience of becoming pregnant at 35—navigating “advanced maternal age” risks while also discovering the unique joys of older parenthood.

One mother reflected:
“I was worried about being too old, too tired, and not living long enough to see my child grow up. But I also realized I was stepping into parenthood with more life experience, stability, and perspective.”

Why Do Parents Delay Having Children?

Career and Financial Stability

Many couples today prioritize building careers and financial security before starting a family. With rising costs of living and education, waiting until the mid-thirties or beyond allows parents to feel more prepared to provide.

Relationship Readiness

For some, marriage and partnership take time to establish. Being a couple first—enjoying years of shared growth before adding children—can make the transition into parenthood smoother.

Shifts in Social Norms

Past generations often pressured women to have children young. Today, societal norms are slowly shifting, and while stigma still lingers, more parents are choosing later pregnancies as a valid option.

What Does Research Say About Older Parenthood?

While the term “advanced maternal age” is medical, it often carries unnecessary judgment. Research acknowledges that risks—such as miscarriage, pre-term labor, and complications—do increase after 35. Women may also experience greater physical strain during pregnancy and recovery.

At the same time, studies also highlight benefits: older parents often bring maturity, emotional readiness, and stronger financial stability into raising children. One review found that children of older parents may benefit from greater patience and perspective in parenting, as well as higher household stability.

Age Is Just a Number—But Health Matters

Many mothers describe feeling more physically taxed in their mid- to late thirties compared to their twenties. Sleepless nights, toddler-chasing, and work-life balance can be harder with age. And of course, comments from relatives—“Won’t you be too old to keep up?”—don’t help.

But parenting is not about the number of years—it’s about the quality of the time and presence you bring. As one mom reflected, “He won’t remember that I was 39 when he turned four, but he’ll remember that I showed up to his school party with the cake he wanted.”

What Truly Matters in Parenting

At the end of the day, children don’t measure love by their parents’ age. They remember attention, warmth, and presence. The giggles at bedtime, the comfort of a hug, the small traditions that stick for life—those moments matter more than a birth certificate date.

Older parents may face unique fears, but they also carry unique strengths: wisdom, perspective, and often, a deeper appreciation of the privilege of raising a child.

What Do You Think?

This is a deeply personal topic, shaped by medical realities, cultural beliefs, and individual life paths. Have you or someone you know chosen to have kids later in life? Did the benefits outweigh the challenges? And how did your perspective on age influence your parenting journey?

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